Wednesday, November 3, 2010

DON'T TALK TO ME...I'M NAKED!!!


So do you look? Do you Chat? Do women look? Do men look? Where do you look?

I had the misfortune to be in a change room with a group of naked women last week. The reason I say misfortune is not because of the company, all these women are Fabulous women. The misfortune is that I HATE have conversations with naked women.

When I am changing I am in stealth mode. I remove and reapply clothing as fast as humanly possible, I keep my head down, stay low and don't make any sudden moves. I am in and out faster than my ex-husband...

So why is it that I always get caught up in a convo with "Naked Chatty Woman" ??? You know who she is...And if you are one, Shame on You...I don't know where to look...!
So I stare you dead in the eye with a serial killer glare and you still insist on making small talk.

The sillies are swinging, the muffin man is RIGHT THERE...I swear to god if you put your leg on that bench to apply moisturizer I am going to EYE PUNCH you...

I am a very social person when I am clothed and not being bumped by boobs and beavers...

So let's take it outside shall we...

Do men do this? Do they talk sports and babes with their "business" on parade?

Cheers





9 comments:

  1. that was an awkward moment in there - we got closer than i though we'd get... i learned at a very early age how to change without removing all of the garments.

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  2. Oh, chatty naked man exists. Junk out, modesty tossed aside; suddenly, he wants to talk about the Jets.

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  3. I commented last week on a similar post about hubby's gym trauma.. naked cellphone guy doing LUNGES. He never went back.

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  4. LOL! One of the reasons I didn't want to go, actually. Oh, and I don't wax for strangers ;)

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  5. OMG I feel the exact same way! Sorry for talking so much:)

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  6. This is the most hilarious post I've read today! Toooooo funny, and I know exactly what you mean!

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  7. Oh, you are so funny, you have me rolling on the floor! My daughter had to come over to see what I was laughing at.

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  8. I think that men have no problem with naked changeroom talking and in fact prefer to flaunt their man bits to each other. Women should feel proud of their total womanly hotness also, but we are all eyes down and hidey hidey. Personally, I'm happy to keep it that way.

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  9. Ah yes, that night. I joked that we all went from knowing each other as tiny little avatars on twitter to knowing way too much about each other in less than 4 hours.

    We had conversations, but I don't think anyone made eye contact or even looked at each other. Focus on what you're doing and get outta there. I'm all for clothed conversations.

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